Joy doesn’t need justification

Play has always had a place in my life.

Even in serious roles and structured environments, I’ve found ways to bring humour, imagination, and joy into the room. It’s one of the privileges I carry - being able to access play not just in private moments, but in my work too.

But even so, I’ve noticed how easily it slips down the list and how quickly it becomes an afterthought. Not because we don’t value it, but because the world around us is constantly telling us that unless something is productive, it simply doesn’t count.

The shift is subtle. It’s the difference between dancing because the music moves you and deciding it could be a good workout. Between writing for joy and wondering if it’s worth posting. Between choosing fun for its own sake and needing it to prove its value.

Somewhere along the line, many of us internalised the message: Play is fine, as long as it earns its place.

We’ve been taught that play is frivolous

Most of us grew up believing that play is something you grow out of. That it’s indulgent or childish; at best a reward, at worst a distraction. It’s the thing you’re allowed to do only when the real work is done.

And in a culture that glorifies productivity, that belief hardens. Even our downtime becomes performative. We track our steps, log our reading habits, turn our interests into goals, so much so, that we mistake activity for aliveness.

But the reality is, that without play, life flattens. We become efficient but not energised. Capable but not connected. We move through our days with the dullness that comes from being constantly “on” and never fully alive.

Play isn’t optional. It’s essential.

Dr. Stuart Brown, founder of the National Institute for Play, describes play as a biological necessity, right up there with rest, nourishment and connection. And it makes sense because play boosts creativity, strengthens resilience and increases our capacity for joy.

But this isn’t just theory, it’s something we feel in our bones. When play disappears, we don’t just get bored, we lose access to something essential. We lose the version of ourselves that is curious, imaginative and light.

The play equation (and why it feels so hard)

I like to think of play as natural, instinctive, even easy, but somewhere along the way, we were all taught that it needs to earn its place. That our joy must be justified and that rest comes after we’ve proved our worth.

And that’s why play can feel so hard. We’ve absorbed a formula that looks a little like this:

Play = Productivity + Purpose + Performance

If it burns calories, makes money, or improves us in some measurable way, it counts. If not, it gets quietly pushed to the side.

But real play? The kind that restores, energises, and reconnects us? That follows a different formula entirely:

Play = Curiosity + Freedom – Outcome

It doesn’t need to impress anyone. It doesn’t need to be shared, tracked, or monetised. It’s about doing something for the joy of doing it and that’s where its power lies.

What might that look like for you?

Maybe it’s painting again, even if the canvas never leaves your flat.

Maybe it’s pulling together a playlist that makes you want to move.

Maybe it’s going to a comedy night and laughing too loud.

Or perhaps it’s being the least coordinated one in the dance class and loving it anyway.

Play doesn’t have to be big or impressive, it just has to be yours. And if your life has started to feel beige (or a little too tightly controlled) then play might be exactly what’s missing.

Want to reclaim your spark?

If you’re ready to bring more lightness back into your life, The Play Project is a 30-day audio course designed to help you reconnect with your joy, creativity, and sense of play. Inspired by Stuart Brown research into play, in no more that five minutes a day, The Pay Project gives you space to feel more like yourself again. Click here to explore The Play Project. And if you’re curious about what an audio course on play sounds like, check out the free 3-day taster on Spotify, Apple Podcasts or YouTube.

A final thought

Joy doesn’t need to be productive and fun doesn’t have to be earned. You don’t have to wait until everything is done to choose joy. And you certainly don’t need a milestone to make space for delight. You’re allowed to feel good without explaining why.

Play isn’t the thing that distracts you from your purpose. It’s the thing that reconnects you to it.